Friday 27 April 2012

Bring it on Cancer...

    After the initial shock of the new diagnosis had worn off it was time for my family and I to move on and put on our fighting faces. I do not like to lose at anything and this was certainly not the battle that I was willing to lose. Bring it on Cancer!
    I was still on the respirator, but the doctors decided it would be a good idea to slowly remove it since it increases the risk of infection. That would be the last thing my body needed to add to the growing list of problems. The doctors warned that this may cause distress to me which would increase my heart rate which would then increase the pressure inside my head. This was a risk they were willing to take though, as one more infection could potentially be lethal to me. My vitals were strong enough so it was time for it to come out.
    On August 21st, 2009 I was taken off the respirator again, hopefully this was the last time! I was watched 24 hours a day by a respiratory technician for the slightest sign of distress. If this were to happen I would be put right back on it. I believe subconsciously I just wanted to prove something. The respirator was removed and I had no difficulties. A down side to having a tube put in and pulled out of my throat so many times was that my vocal cords were slightly damaged. If I wanted to communicate it would be through hand signals or whispers. Let me tell you it is very frustrating when the only sound you can make is a whisper. There were many times that I got so frustrated and my family members got the short end of the stick. I think my Mom, Dad and Dale all had my fingernails stuck into their hand or forearm at some point!
    You all may be wondering if there are any positives at this point. They were a few. Believe me my family would take any shred of good news the doctors had. Like I said my vitals were strong, first positive. The blood test taken on this particular day showed no new immature white blood cells (aka cancer cells) located in any of my organs, second positive. My first round of chemo for the APL was finished, third positive. Even though I was finished the chemo for the first type of cancer I was still receiving a Vitamin A derivative that causes immature white blood cells to mature into normal white cells. My body was accepting this treatment without any complications, another positive.
    Since my body was dealing with so many other complications, the doctors felt that my chemo treatments for the brain leukemia (AML) would have to be held off until some of the other complications improved. They did not want to put too much stress on my body since I was already in a very delicate state.
    The last MRI that I had done showed that the new brain bleed, which we now know is a stroke caused from the ATRA, occurred very close to the portion of my brain that controls vision and speech. The doctors did not believe that I would have any long term effects once the bleed clears itself up. I'm sure my family was crossing their fingers!
    The doctors decided to suspend any thoughts of doing anymore bone marrow biopsies at this point as I was too unstable. They feel that possibly by my 40th day of treatment they will try again. As for the treatment for the AML (brain cancer), I was in the second stage which is the consolidation stage. If the other life threatening complications can be stabilized I would undergo an 8 week regime that consisted of chemo being administered intrathecally (through the lumbar punctures.)  Oh great, 8 weeks of lumbar punctures, something to look forward to...

    Everyone was wondering not only how I was doing, but how my family was holding up. My Mom was spending every moment by my side. I was beginning to get sick of her!! Just kidding of course. She developed a routine at the hospital. Rushing out for a 5 minute shower every morning around 5:30am while I slept, grabbed a tea from the nurses station and back to her chair by 6am in time for the nurse to come in and draw my blood. She slept in a chair beside my bedside most nights. She had to fight to get that chair! Initially the nurses did not want any family members staying the night with me. Wrong thing to say to her, she refused and said she would sleep on the floor if she had to. They eventually brought her a chair haha. Dad and Dale would take turns spending the odd night with me to give her a break to go home, even though in her mind she was wanting to be with me. Momma Bear had to be forced to go home. People were beginning to think that she worked at the hospital! Dad and Dale were back at the hospital bright and early each and every morning.
    Mom, Dad and Dale all took stress leaves from work. I guess I don't blame them. Dale tried to work but I guess his mind wasn't all there. He made the decision to take time off when he almost got hit by a train. Good choice I'd say!
    My family was amazingly supportive. I had someone by my side 24 hours a day. Even though they were under a great deal of stress, everytime I opened my eyes there was a smiling face looking back at me. I did not see any one of them cry once! I can never thank them enough for this. Without even realizing it I got a lot of my strength from them!
   
The chair that had to be fought for!

   

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